Closing in on Deadline.

so far, this job has been a mile a minute and all full of turns and twists. mostly fun ones.
the level of talent i am working with would blow your freaking mind. seriously.
i am beyond impressed by some of it.
like WOAH. MIND BLOWED.

first deadline for the february issue is sunday, and i already have some work in my hot little hands, and have a list of articles that have yet to be assigned or written.

which means that next week i will be busy.
busy busy busy.

so what about the transition?
i would be lying if i told you i am not experiencing guilt with the kids.
for the most part, they are doing quite well.
thank god for the school.
they have a brilliantly consistent loving place to go to.
and they love being there.

they start 3 days a week next week.
i just can't seem to have enough time in a day working on 2 days a week.
and it is stressful for all of us if i am working while with them.

last week i asked madee what she wanted to be when she grows up and she said "a firefighter".
then she said, "NO. wait. i want to be a mommy."
and that made my heart drop into my stomach.
i want her to be so many things, and if mommy is one of them then yay.
but i want her to know herself and the things that fire her up.
i want her to discover the joy that goes along with doing something she is passionate about.
i want her to be able to show her own kids that she can do anything.

so i show her myself how these things work.
i explain when i need to.
but i do a lot of snuggling and sharing my life with her.
so she can know me.

so she can know herself.

ahem...testing...

i got a job.
not just ANY job, my dream job.
i wasn't even looking for it,
but it seems it was the thing my life was missing.
and that surprises me.

i have historically had all kinds of jobs
but just for a bit.
i was on employment once,
before it was cool
and it was an awesome job
but again, didn't last very long.

at the 7th month of my 1st pregnancy
i was put on bedrest and never looked back.
so for the past 4 years i have been wiping butts.
for a living.
and it hasn't paid well,
but the benes have been awesome.

but this?
this job?
it found me, it wanted me, it lured me in and locked the deadbolt behind me
and though sometimes that is coming on a little strong
it was just right for me.

and now i am adjusting.
we are ALL adjusting.
but it is a good adjustment.

because now i am living at the beach
working for a killer magazine
the kids love their school
and everything is coming up awesome.

and this is where i thought i might come and share all that.

so you can be a happy little sea cow, too.